Right now, I’m hearing a song in my head… Fighter by Christina Aguilera. You know the one? Oh, how this song resonates so much with me. All the hardship I endured growing up, coming from a broken home, experiencing my parents' messy divorce wasn’t the perfect childhood. Divorce isn't easy for any child.
We all go through obstacles in life. I’m thinking of all those difficult situations and people that brought a tear to my eye. The breakups, having to say goodbye to a friendship, leaving that job, watching a loved one pass away. Life gets hard sometimes.
Watching my mother fight for my brother and me, work multiple jobs to put food on the table, all whilst studying to gain an education, has given me a thick skin. It’s also given me so much more than I could have imagined, and only something I’ve truly become appreciative of in recent years since being a mother. I don’t wear rose coloured glasses. I’m realistic. I don’t look at life as if it’s a fairy tale, I see it for what it is. Yet I still remain positive and hopeful.
Sometimes you need to face your fears and deepest wounds to learn, self-reflect and move on. All the obstacles I’ve faced along the way, the soul-searching and the self-development on my part have led me to where I am today. Everything I’ve endured has moulded me into a strong independent woman.
Us women we don’t ever give up, we persist, and we get to the finish line. If there is one thing I’ve learnt is to always fight for what you believe in and for what you want in life. Nothing comes served on a silver platter.
And now that I have my own daughter it brings up a whole lot of emotions and anxiety. I want to give her the childhood I never had, the picture perfect happy family. I want to constantly shield her from negative influences, buy her everything she desires, stand next to her to catch her when she falls and smother her with endless kisses.
But I also worry that maybe I am shielding her too much from the reality of life. I worry that things will be too easy for her and she won’t grow a thick skin and learn to fight for herself. Because sometimes life knocks you down and you need to get back up there, dust yourself off, and fight like you’ve never fought before.
How has your childhood affected the way you parent?